[blastbeat]

sounds stupid right? well its true. my mom said i cant play in my band because she doesnt like the style music i play. because i live in a town where good drummers are hard to find and the band i had to quit is out one. and im mad because this band had a chance of actually going somewhere. so if anyone has any advice on what to do...please share.

[shazaam]

Ummm tell your mom you like what you play and don't find inspiration in other music,...? What kinda stuff you play?

[Sean Francis]

This is probably not the greatest advice to be giving someone, but in your position I would just tell her to take a hike. It's not her business to determine who you do or don't play for/with based on what she thinks of the music you play. She's not respecting or supporting you as a son, or even as a human being, if she thinks that she has the power to govern your artistic choices.

Time to put the "big boy" shoes on, with or without her "consent." You are the drummer, not her; if she doesn't like the music you play, she doesn't have or need to listen. Nobody's forcing it on her.

It's a free country and a free world, filled with people who have freewill; you can be in whatever band you want to be in. Do what is right for you and f*ck anyone and everyone who tries to stand in your way!

[Church Drummer]

Originally Posted by blastbeat

sounds stupid right? well its true. my mom said i cant play in my band because she doesnt like the style music i play. because i live in a town where good drummers are hard to find and the band i had to quit is out one. and im mad because this band had a chance of actually going somewhere. so if anyone has any advice on what to do...please share.

Blastbeat, my oppinion on this isn't going to be popular with the majority of the people on here. You don't say how old you are in your post so your age would effect my answer. As a parent myself I can tell you that it is our responsibility to ensure that our children are involved in activities that are age appropriate, so my response to you would be different if you are thirteen than if you are 17. I didn't let my 13 year old sons, play mature video games or see R-Rated movies, or listen to or play music full of F-Bombs, and innapropraite language for someone of his age. At 17 or 18 my standards relaxed some. As long as your parents are supporting you, and are responsible for you (which in most cases, unless you're emancipated your parents can be held responsible for your actions until you're 18, and in some states it's even 21) they have a responsibility and a right to monitor and approve your activities.

Is it only the style of the music that your Mom objects to, or is it the language used, the venues that you play in, etc. Talk to her calmly and ask her exactly what it is that she objects to about the music, and why. Maybe once you know what it is that she finds most objectionable about the music, you and your bandmates can try to work out a compromise that you can all live with.

[jhilldrums]

My Mom did the same thing, sort of. She told me I could not play clubs until 18. Church Drummer is right, but so are some of the points in the other posts. Don't do anything hasty. Your opinion of your band as your being told to leave is high. I don't know anything about you or your band, but I'm sure if your worth it you'll be in another good siuation before you know it. Good luck and do whatever you do calmly. Band mates go away, parents are yours forever.

[guss]

I'm Guss's mom. It seems like your mom knows what is best for you but can you understand where she is coming from? Unless she seems off mark most of all of the time and doesn't keep up with where you are at, my advice is to listen to what she says. Then keep talking together to find a common path together that feels right to both of you.
She knows you longer and better than anyone else so it is worth it to listen to her. But it is important that you bring her along to understand the music you like and why.
Me and Gus share classic rock for example. If I am correct to what genre you play, it is defintly not classic rock. But that doesn't mean you two can't connect by tellling your mom how your music relieves stress for you and there are worse and violent ways to get stress out than your music.
Rock on!

Guss's explaination: If there is hardcore involved (genre music for those who don't know) it is all about the message. Try to get your mom to listen and appreciate it. My mom related to Drop Anchor which is my favorite Boston hardcore band. On the internet she was able to read the lyrics from Myspace before she listened to the music. It worked. She appreciated it. Also check out Atfault's lyrics Skinslappers band (Liberal messages, hopefully you and your mom agree).