If you leave off the reso you might replace it with a mesh to keep the lug mounts from rattling. The tone has less over tone ring and sustain but its easier to tune to a single note.
Batter head supports the attack, punch, or projection
resonant head supports the tone like you said.
Personally I find single headed toms boxy and lacking. But that is me. Phil Collins plays
with single headed drums.
There is nothing you can do about resonance of the room unless you treat the room. If you
want to reduce the loud booming then start by adding something to soak up the sound. A good couple of blankets, sound isolation foam, whatever.
Realize that with a basement you might run the risk of damaging your drums. Unless it is a finished basement I'd refrain from garages and basements. Again that is a personal preference of mine sometimes the choice of another location just isn't there.
I have an ancient Royce kit that has popped the lug retainers on the batter side on the toms so I borrowed the resosnant side retainers to replace them and currently play with batter heads only including the bass. Though I'm no Phil Collins I can still get my point across when the music's turned up LOUD. The upside is you have a spare head if you pop one, good in an emergency.
For sound insulation, you can also try (if you can find it) large "egg crate" type material that is used in chicken houses. The poultry supply houses are plentiful here in the South, but can be difficult to find in many places (particularly urban areas). Good luck with the sound proofing, but definitely get a de-humidifier ir you are in a humid area. Plus the fan is a good idea.
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